WHAT TO EXPECT DURING THE STAGES OF LABOR

Stages of labor

What you’ll feel and how you + your partner can cope.

Oftentimes in birthing classes, we are walked through the different stages of labor. If you’re a first time mom who hasn’t experienced them before, it might be challenging to know when you’re in each phase and what you can expect.

PRE-LABOR

The first stage is pre-labor, which is described as on and off contracts that are not progressing. This means they don’t become more intense and they don’t get any closer together. This phase can be really frustrating for mamas who are experiencing this because it can start much earlier than your due date. It can cause exhaustion, pain and discomfort.

It can also be confusing as a first time mama who is unsure when to head to the hospital or not. We also recommend checking with your health care provider on what they suggest! Based on your history or current pregnancy, they may have different instructions on when you should head to your birthing center.

In general, you can use the “5-1-1” run of thumb - which means if your contractions are 5 minutes apart, lasting one minute long for one hour, it’s go time!

EARLY LABOR

This is up to 3cm dilated. Usually during this phase, women can still use coping mechanisms to work through it. Some things that might help the birther to get through this phase is finding a relaxation technique, using distractions, counting breaths, rocking with their partner etc. It’s important for the supporter to stay calm and provide helpful reminders.

ACTIVE LABOR (1st stage)

This is 3 - 6cm dilated. This one is coined “the moment of truth” - there’s no going back now! It starts to set in that this is REALLY happening. As a support person, it’s really important to start matching the birthers mood. Take your cues from her - she might not be joking, wanting small talk or any discussion around her contractions. It’s critical as the partner that you match that mood, and understand that the woman’s body is now in the drivers seat.

ACTIVE LABOR (2nd stage)

This is 6 - 8cm dilated. Things start to get pretty intense during this phase! The birther might become very serious, withdrawn and quiet as she works through the pain. She also might become much more clear and direct with her needs - which is great! As the partner, you should continue to match their mood and give them your undivided attention if you’re being used for support.

TRANSITION

This is 8 - 10cm dilated. The final stage!! Birthers can really feel out of control and afraid during this phase. It can cause a variety of symptoms for women including shaking, vomiting, hot or cold flashes, and immense fear and anxiety. Its crucial that the partner doubles down on the encouragement, and reminds the birther that they are almost to the finish line! When it seems like things are out of control, that means you can be SO close to meeting your babe!

In this phase, your partner can help by reinforcing the rituals from active labor, staying close and remaining fully engaged, and remaining calm and confident in them.

And then… it’s time to meet your baby!

I hope this was helpful to you as you prepare for the most exciting journey ahead - motherhood!

XO Amy

PS Did you know we have a Prepping For Labor + Delivery Course that covers this and SO much more to help prepare your mind, body and partner for delivery? Get the course here.